WandaVision, Paul Bettany, and Johnny Depp

I'm as big a Marvel film nerd as anyone.  To be clear, just the films. I have not read the comics and never will.  But I LOVE the films!  Not just Marvel, I am very down with DC too.  I am one of the few you'll meet who will admit to enjoying Justice League.  Honestly, it was worth it for this scene alone:



I could go on at length about Momoa's currently unapparelled charisma and why I like both Ezra and Grant Gustin's (CW's Arrowverse) very different portrayals of Flash.  But that's for another post, let's stick with Marvel for now.

Like everyone else, I've been hungry for new content during the endless hellscape of 2020.  So I was pleased when I found out WandaVision will be streaming soon.  I never really gave any thought to Vision and to me he was just a peripheral character.  I recall reading somewhere that Joss Whedon was the one who wanted to cast Bettany in the role.

I guess I should have known something was wrong then.  My opinion of Whedon has been devolving for a long time now.  So, shoulda been a red flag.

I do love Scarlet Witch so even though I'm very "meh" on "Vis", I was excited.

I've long tried to avoid the ongoing Johnny Depp saga. I really don't know anything about Amber Heard, but I do side-eye allegations against her, simply because I have noted how floods of new posters come in on any post about the former couple.  And boy, do they sound message-approved.  I suspect Depp pays PR pros to post positive stuff about him online, and also, negative comments about Heard.  

And then there's this; I really didn't give a shit.  Johnny Depp isn't even on my radar.  

But then he had to go and drag Marvel into his shit.

This story here?  This is not a good story.

Texts from Bettany to Depp:

"I just thought of a way for us to make a lot of money! I know you already have a lot of money but I mean A LOT of money and with very little effort.

First of, all we buy Amber a pet beaver and then we take pictures of you shaving said beaver. ‘All that’s left is to do is to create a website with the domain name “Johnny Depp shaves Amber Heard’s beaver” and then we sell advertising space like fucking crazy!!! ‘Clearly there are many spin offs – you could poke, stroke, punch, etc."

So this right here tells me Bettany is a man who says things like "she needs a cunt punch".  

More texts from the delightful Mr. Bettany:

"I’m not sure we should burn Amber. She is delightful company and pleasing on the eye. We could of course do the English course of action and perform a drowning test. Thoughts? You have a swimming pool."

Depp replies: ‘Let’s drown her before we burn her!!! I will fuck her burnt corpse afterwards to make sure she’s dead."

Bettany replies: ‘My thoughts entirely. Let’s be certain before we pronounce her a witch."

Imagine a man says to you that he is going to fuck his wife's burnt corpse to make sure she's dead.

And your reply is: "My thoughts entirely."

But wait...in court, Depp helpfully explained that Bettany and Heard had their difference and didn’t like each other very much.

Well, then, I can see it.  Of course if you don't like a woman very much you do root for her to be drowned, burnt, and then raped posthumously, absolutely.

For instance, I really cannot stand Kellyanne Conway, and if any man came up to me and said he would like to fuck her burnt corpse, I would totally...back slowly away from him and call the police.

 I am so fed up with misogyny.  In some ways it's fascinating because misogyny kills and not just women.

Hillary Clinton is not President because of misogyny.  That's just a fact.  I can even trace this to one man: James Comey.  If James Comey had any respect for his female boss, Loretta Lynch, he wouldn't have announced reopening the email case against Hillary Clinton 11 days before the election, while refusing to say that Trump was under investigation over his Russian ties.  And boom! Hillary Clinton wins the electoral college.  This is a fact.  And that's just the misogyny of one man.  There was plenty more misogyny deployed against Hillary Clinton that led us to this shitshow.  Thousands dead who would not have died under a Clinton administration.

Many of them men.  Many of them who wanted to TRUMP THAT BITCH.  And today, they would be alive and breathing.  Instead, they are six feet under, forevermore. 

Okay, so that part is funny and this is not  humorous piece, so let's move on. 

What to do about all of this misogyny?  It's funny how I can suspend disbelief about superheroes, but a sick fuck misogynist like Bettany playing one is like "record scratch". 

It's really hard to get out of my mind, and frankly, I don't wanna.  I did wonder if we weren't better off in the Hollywood Golden Age when information like this would never come to light.  But, nah.  That wasn't better.  That was just ignorance.  Ignorance may be bliss but it's a phony one.

I really want to watch WandaVision but I am furious that Joss Whedon planted another woman-hater in a key role.  I am furious there are so many women-haters.  I am very suspicious that most of Hollywood is comprised of women-haters.  

And at the same time I'm compelled and drawn to stories and world building and the escapism they provide me. 

I don't have the answer.  I will say, FUCK Paul Bettany.  You fucking animal.  And I will be thrilled the day he is OUT of the Marvel Universe.  In fact, get out now, animal.  I hope Vision is killed off, AGAIN, and this time it takes. 

And for any of his coworkers, and that's what you are, coworkers btw, who take issue with this? Fuck you too.  Your publicist should tell you to keep your ignorant thoughts to yourself.  This goes double for you Scarjo.  


  • Manders

    This was an excellent and cathartic read.

    And fuck Craig too, I guess.

  • Craig

    Well. This is certainly a take.

Leave a comment