Vaccine Card or Sex Passport?

And Gen X I'm talkin to you!  Oh, I know, you're not used to people talking about you and probably figured this was about the Millennials or, and God forbid, Boomers (we've ALL heard enough about their sex lives). 

But nah, I'm Gen X and I'm talking to and about my people here. 

Peeps, it's our time!  

First, check out this headline and pull paragraph from Reuters:

Gen X emerging from pandemic with firmer grip on America's wallet

"Crammed between the cultural extremes of the baby boomers and the millennials, members of Generation X saw their wealth jump during the Trump administration and through the coronavirus pandemic as they hit their prime earning years during a record bull market for stocks."

Now, I'm gonna leave Gen Z out of this on account of I have a big soft spot for those little Tik Tok'ing charmers making a fool out of Trump numerous times.  I just like them.  

And I'm not really here for generational wars honestly.  But the fact remains Gen X'ers have been ignored all our lives.  The thing is?

We never cared.

So that was okay.  But constantly being bombarded by a consumer culture  targeting Boomers, and living our lives in a culture both shaped by and for the previous generation, we're a little jaded.  Don't even get me started on Madison Avenue's obsession with Boomer erections.

All those years living as the way cooler little siblings, we're not used to being in power, or in the spotlight.  We're definitely not used to Madison Avenue giving a shit about us one way or the other.

That may change now that we're holding the purse strings though, huh?  

I've always been proud to be Gen X, the latchkey generation.  It really wasn't as bad as it may sound, and we trained early for a pandemic shutdown.  Years of running home as fast as we could because nobody was waiting to meet us at the bus stop, locking our doors as soon as we were inside, and spending the rest of the day playing Space Invaders while eating Steak-ums does something to you.

We were prepared for quarantine far more than any other living generation.  And looks like we were saving our pennies the entire time too.

I have to admit I LOVE this image that went viral on Twitter, showing how the three different generations I am writing about here reacted to lockdown. 

The only quibble I have is that I really don't view Millennials as crybabies.  I think that's something boomers invented because they appear to hate their offspring?  But Gen X and Boomers?  Dead-on.  Boomers were all over coughing on grocery store employees, wild-eyed and drooling.   I mean, I had to buy mace after the 12th video of a Boomer-gone-wild hit Twitter.  I was praying one of them would cough on me.  Then you woulda seen some shit.

Yes, yes, I know "not all Boomers".  If it don't apply, let if fly. 

So, now what?  

I don't really know what the pandemic is going to do to the divorce rate, and I don't think anyone will know until 3 - 5 years from now.

So, with that put aside, let's talk about single Gen X'ers.  Divorced or never married as many of us never did.  Either or, doesn't matter.

What now?

We got our juicy bank accounts, and our vaccination cards.  We have our passports, our men can still get erections, and our women probably look younger than any previous generation to this point.  (calm down Millennials, yes I do think you'll best us when your time comes) 

Is Generation X about to usher in the new roaring 20's?  

I think so.  I know I'm ready.   I received my second Pfizer a week ago, in one week I will be "fully vaccinated" and I am ready.

Half of white boomers probably won't even vaccinate, they are too Trump-adjacent.   Look, they'll still be out there this summer, maskless, erection pills in hand, MAGA hats on their heads, so keep an eye out.  You definitely want to spot them before they see you.  Then, run.  Oh that's another thing we can still do - run.  

This is the Gen X summer.  The very first summer of the new roaring 20's.   Here it begins.  We are about to own the 20's. 

Once the decade ends, our oldest will be early 60's.  We are very aware of this.  We were locked inside for a year, accruing wealth and musing about our mortality. 

Step aside, you don't want to be between us and living right now. 


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