The Comedy Bros; On Joe Rogan, Jon Stewart, Et al.
Joe Rogan has been in the news a lot lately, mostly over his rampant Covid-disinformation. Rogan is a former UFC commentator, former Fear Factor host, and current host of his daily diarrhea podcast on Spotify. He now bills himself as "a comedian." Welp, that's the kiss of death if ever I heard one.
Until Bernie Sanders fell in love with him, I had never heard his name. I had to look up what in hell the UFC is, and I never watch reality television. But in 2020, Sanders decided we all needed to win over Joe Rogan.
Now I know who he is. Another edgelord. These fucking comedy bros are so predictable. They're not funny, and they're not cute. Edgy? Look at this dude
He looks exactly like 20 different dudes I could meet on any given night at Eleanor's in Bohemia. They are not edgy, trust me! Unless experimenting with how long they can go without showering counts!
So of course, his Covid bullshit started a whole thing. Neil Young pulled his music from Spotify in protest. But no popular current artists followed, so you might think the whole thing would die down.
You'd be wrong. Because it ends up, Joe Rogan has also been doing racism. Who'd have thought! I was about fit to faint from the shock when I heard, as you can imagine. And I certainly hope you are sitting down.
wow he basically couldn’t stop saying the N-word https://t.co/UlQiK9vJ8k— Eric Boehlert (@EricBoehlert) February 5, 2022
Oh, how edgy. A white guy using the n word! You don't hear that every day. Are you not bowled over by the edginess?
So as you can imagine, the idiots over at Spotify have been shredding shit as fast as they can, and have deleted over 70 Rogan podcasts so far.
Another edgelord, Jon Stewart, decided he couldn't just sit there and shut up, he had to brave the breach and open his big, fat mouth.
"Don't leave. Don't abandon. Don't censor. Engage," Stewart said. "But this overreaction to Rogan, I think, is a mistake."
Now, I don't know if he said this before or after Spotify let their shredders loose, because these edgelords are so edgy, I can't keep total track of their edgy comings and goings.
But how did he not know, either way? Surely he didn't defend a guy without ever hearing his show?
Well, now he's wearing Rogan's racism. How does that fit, Jon? Maybe pretty well, I wouldn't know.
And Jon is also now wearing this:
Here’s Joe Rogan in 2011, laughing hysterically during a discussion about coercing young women into performing oral sex. It’s hard to watch, tbh. (TW: Sexual assault, graphic language). pic.twitter.com/hLzbAcKuGx— Caroline Orr Bueno, Ph.D (@RVAwonk) February 5, 2022
Coercing young women into sex. Hilarious, right?
Just recently, Dave Chappelle went on some trans-hate rant, and of course, the bros couldn't race in fast enough to defend him. Pissing on Transgender people is just so edgy you see.
So we were treated to the likes of Patton Oswalt (I admit, that one hurt) and Bill Maher (that one didn't) defending this asshole. After all, how are men expected to be funny if they can't make fun of LGBTQ, women, and black people?
Or force women to watch them masturbate, as Louis C.K. famously did? It's just so tough out there for an edgelord.
*I had to bold that one because guess what? They gave him a f'ing Grammy award last night!
I don't know if Spotify's shredders will be able to get everything, I do know they have their hands full.
This is snowballing, and maybe they will be forced to deplatform Rogan's podcast, which apparently two HUNDRED million people download every month. Two hundred million! I thought at first I was misreading, and they meant two million.
But nope, two hundred million morons are listening to this guy spew Covid-disinformation, racism, and of course, plenty of misogyny, every month.
Now I realize why Bernie Sanders wanted in.
So even if he does get booted from Spotify, he will still be here, trust me.
Last year, Rogan went on some crazy rant, well apparently his whole show is one crazy rant after the other, and said this:
“You can never be woke enough that’s the problem, it keeps going,” Rogan said. “It keeps going further and further down the line and if you get to the point where you capitulate, where you agree to all these demands, it’ll eventually get to straight white men are not allowed to talk, because it’s your privilege to express yourself when other people of color have been silenced throughout history.”
Oh, so straight white men won't be allowed to talk? Wake me up when that happens, because I have never been able to shut even one of them the fuck up.
"He continued: “It will be, you’re not allowed to go outside. Because so many people were imprisoned for so many—”
When List (his guest) laughed, Rogan said: "I'm not joking, it really will get there. It's that crazy."
Now, they're going to prison for talking and they're not allowed outside. Sure!
Here's his real fear, shared by all of his comedy bros:
“Can you make a good comedy movie anymore, or have they made it so dangerous in terms of being canceled, that comedy movies are no longer something you can do?"
What this gobbledygook means is; if we can't be hateful towards racial minorities, and women, and gays, how are we going to be funny?
You know what? You probably can't be. Because you're not funny. None of you are. Only other racist, sexist, stupid fucks think this shit is funny. You will never be funny to normal people, because you have no talent. Being a bully isn't a talent.
And that's all these poster bros for Dry Ass Pussy really are. Bullies. Always punching down. Never up.
Update: So, let's talk about "the slap". I'm really upset for Will Smith. Be clear, not at Will Smith, for Will Smith. He had to resign from the academy, and Netflix apparently has a project of his on hold. Why? Because he slapped a mean bully.
If someone had slapped Seth MacFarlane the night he sang that degrading boob song, or Ricky Gevais on just about any night, we wouldn't be here. And someone should have slapped both those dudes.
I am not going to get into what black women go through regarding their hair. You know why? Because I am not a black woman, and so many black women have written on this. I highly recommend this article at Teen Vogue if you're white and would like to educate yourself a little bit.
I will write about this as a white woman addressing other white women. STOP CLUTCHING YOUR PEARLS and give me a break. Oh, if I only had 10 bucks for every "I was triggered" post. Oh poor you, to quote Liv Soprano.
Should Will Smith have slapped Chris Rock? Probably not, especially for his own sake. Does Chris Rock deserve to me slapped? Oh yeah. He has a big history of misogyny, and let's be clear; of misogynoir. I have never liked him or his "humor". Always punching down, never up.
I don't need to see a bunch of white women acting like this is the most violent, triggering thing they've ever seen. Get over yourselves.
This is a drawing created by someone I follow on Twitter:
Will be trying this out as my new pinned tweet. The MyPillow guy has to go. pic.twitter.com/rACeKzVUXc— 🏳️🌈💛⚖️ PETTY RUBBLE TO GIVE YOU TROUBLE (@HillaryzMyHmgrl) March 30, 2022
I really feel as if he drew it just for me. That could be me in that picture, it's exactly how I often feel.
A lot of his fellow comedians came out and said words about the night Chris Rock got slapped. All defending him and some of them were still "traumatized". I say, Stay Salty! Die mad about it. These fuckers are all so up in arms, but they love themselves some Louis C.K. Traumatized over one man slapping another man, but they stay buddies with the serial sex assaulter.
So let me get out the world's tiniest violin for these clowns. But for Will Smith, an incredible talent, and someone who I really think is a decent person (far more decent than Rock), I wish the best. Give it a couple of months Will, maybe weeks, and the bloodthirsty mob will have found another target.
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