People Magazine just named Paul Rudd Sexiest Man Alive and I have thoughts. But first, let's look at some stories from last week, after Page Six "broke the news" that 2021's Sexiest Man Alive was going to be Chris Evans.
Here's from that idiot Lainey:
"Chris Evans is a safe choice – and he could have had this title several years ago, during his run as Captain America. After all, another Chris, Hemsworth, was the Sexiest Man Alive in 2014. Evans may not have been ready for the SMA crown back then though. There was a time during the Cap era when it sounded like he couldn’t wait to stop playing Steve Rogers and couldn’t wait to pivot away from the Marvel machine and start doing more character-driven dramas and/or musicals. Being the SMA back then may not have met his mood."
Or, being SMA never meets his mood. I was so surprised to read about this because I view Evans as someone who is looking at a future in politics. I don't see how the nonsense of SMA is something he'd ever want. Also, Evans famously tortured himself, Marvel, and apparently everyone around him before accepting the Captain America role. He doesn't seem to relish this kind of media circus.
Then there is this:
"It also helps that Michael B. Jordan, as I mentioned yesterday, has returned a certain prestige to the title. The SMA had lost some of its specialness when it seemed like PEOPLE was just giving it to any male coach on The Voice and David Beckham, suggesting that maybe the movie stars were done with it altogether. Idris Elba’s reign certainly helped, and MBJ made a big contribution to the rescue effort last year when he was crowned SMA, because in the same year, he was also on the TIME 100 Most Influential list and was named one of the 25 Greatest Actors of the 21st Century by the New York Times, proving that the SMA doesn’t have to take away from an actor’s gravitas, which has been one of the worries for some actors who’d previously declined the title. Like Ryan Gosling."
I'm sorry, Michael B Jordan did what?
The same Michael B Jordan who did this?
Michael B Jordan got so cringe he didn't "return" shit to shit. Give me a break. I love Jordan, I see everything he's in because he's very talented, and he's incredibly hot, but he didn't make being SMA cool again.
I frankly don't think it is cool again.
Or ever will be.
And here's my favorite loon over at Celebitchy, Kaiser:
"PS… I just remembered that sketchball moment in the summer of 2020 when Chris was hooking up with Lily James! THAT is why he didn’t want to be People’s SMA last year. He hopes people have forgotten all about that!"
Yeah, Chris Evans really hopes you forgot that he got laid one time last year, that was so sketch!
Please shut the fuck up.
Anyway, I wrote about Evans and politics before here.
And I still suspect that's the case, but it's just a suspicion, I don't know him, and as you can see from the above neither do Lainey or Kaiser.
Now let's get to the guy People magazine actually did choose as their Sexiest Man Alive, unbeknownst to the liars and morons over at Page Six.
I don't see it. I think Rudd is cute, maybe adorable to some, but sexy? Sexiest? Nah.
But if Chris Evans is "safe" what is this guy? I know Evans' politics and so do you, and I don't see him as being all that safe, but I barely know Rudd's. I know he's a Dem because he was encouraging people to vote, and Republicans hate when people vote. I don't think many people know Rudd's politics. Paul Rudd is long married and has two kids. Evans is single at 40 and childfree.
Also, it annoys me how everyone lines up to squeal that he "just doesn't age" while not noticing that he's getting work. I mean, if he were a woman do you really believe no one would be talking about that? Then point me to that woman.
I've never cared for Rudd, and I know this is a personal bug, and really based on absolutely nothing. He's almost definitely a great guy.
But sexiest guy? No. Not even close. This is like the year they named John Legend. You should have seen my face, and I LOVE John Legend.
Another swing and a miss by People magazine. Still not as big of a miss as Page Six though, and I am still laughing at those conservative, water-carrying douchebags. Good job Murdoch boys!
Judging by my Twitter feed tho, People Mag did nail it with their base, the so-called mini-van majority. I think we used to call them soccer moms. I really don't know the right label, and I don't like labels when applied to women anyway, so I'll just say the women on my Twitter feed. They seem to love this pick.
You know how people will say things like "Alexander Skarsgard is the sex"? No? Am I the only one who says that? Anyway, for me, Paul Rudd is the anti-sex.
But to each their own and that's what makes this a beautiful world.