How bold of me to start a blog post about men and politics, because honestly, I would need all the blogs. But I'm going to begin here.
First, I should mention that I am a full-on Hillary Clinton stan. I think she's amazing. I think she is a feminist trailblazer, and I also think she dedicated much of her life's work to helping improve the lives of children. That's God's work. Her mother had a terrible childhood, not really a childhood at all, after being essentially abandoned by her own mother. I believe Hillary's heart broke for her mother, and that it gave her a special passion for helping children.
Trump locks them up in cages, where they are neglected, grow ill and are left untreated, are basically tortured, and forces them to "represent' themselves in court.
But in 2016 America took a look at those choices and screamed TRUMP THAT BITCH.
Anyway, I digress...even though I'm a Hillary stan, I somehow ended up in two back-to-back relationships with Bernie Bros. One of them I take full responsibility for as he told me up front he was a "male feminist". If any man ever tells you that, promise me you'll run. But he had a doctorate and I was naive enough to be so flattered that he thought I was smart. Never mind that I was young and, well, I'm gonna be honest, kinda hot, and he was neither! Who should have been flattered here? Right.
Somewhere along the way I realized that he wasn't actually that smart? I realized that I actually was not only smart enough for him to deign to be with, but I was in fact smarter than him. When he wouldn't stop yelling about Hillary Clinton being a fucking neo-natal something or other, I kicked his ass out. Yes, I kicked him out, did I mention that I also make a lot more money than him?
He would sit around all day reading his Marxist bullshit, donating what little money he earned to Bernie Sanders, and complaining about my business. Dirty little capitalist that I am. But guess what? He had no problem charging thousands of dollars on my Amazon account for his "studies".
That should give you some idea of my picker. It's not the best thing about me, okay?
Then right after him, I got involved with a very hot blacksmith, like the total opposite of the doctor, right? And he told me he had actually supported Hillary over Obama in the 08 primary. He also seemed to make a good living. What do you think happened?
Motherfucker got radicalized by the Intercept or some shit, became a Bernie bro, started saying crazy shit about Hillary, and literally quit his job. I think this is a Bernie bro thing. Don't work, slam everyone else who actually makes a living, and feel free to spend their money while you wait for Bernie to usher in the socialist utopia.
So I don't know if it's me, or if this is a white guy thing. And I do not limit myself to white guys, this is just the way the cookie crumbled in the last two cases. It did not crumble in a good way for me. It's a good thing I managed to make a lot of money the past few years, so that I could pay off all the damned shit they charged on my accounts.
Of course then Trump destroyed my business this year, by pretending the virus is a hoax and not doing what every other country with normal leaders did. Like what Angela Merkel has done. What Hillary Clinton would have done.
You know, I've been on the internet for long enough to see how men are politically, and between that and my personal relationships with them, I can say definitively they are fucking dumb. And I am so tired of hearing them. Good God I am so tired of hearing them. Do men ever shut up?
I am planning on writing a book about a woman who gets tired too, so tired that she starts serial killing men for saying stupid political shit. Like any time a man says "what about her emails" she murders him in a really painful, creative way.
I think it's gonna be really good. I'm going to send copies to all my exes.
In the meantime, I'm going to deconstruct men here, one at a time. I might start with Chuck Todd, I haven't decided yet. But the first in my series "WHY ARE MEN SO FUCKING STUPID" is going to post this week. It's going to be a journey, because there are a lot of them and a lot of stupid. I mean, Chris Cillizza alone...