Flying Through The Pandemic

Yesterday, the NYT tweeted out a link to a story and this was their synopsis:

"Passengers on a flight from Dallas to Newark were ordered back to their assigned seats after — in an attempt to gain more social distance —they moved to empty rows. They were told they had not paid for exit row seats, which are more expensive."

I saw it when a mutual quote tweeted it with "THIS is why I don't fly."

I thought that was so funny.

Really, that's why you don't fly?  I remember after 9/11 so  many people told me they were afraid to fly "now".   9/11 had a lot of impact on me but making me afraid to fly wasn't one of them.  I was already terrified of flying.  I mean, you could tell me terrorists were surrounding the plane with rocket launchers as we took off, wouldn't matter.  I couldn't be more scared than I already was.  I believe terror is a finite thing.  You reach a certain point and you throw in tarantulas, or Rush Limbaugh as a seatmate, doesn't matter.  Can't get any worse. 

I just feel like, any activity that could conceivably end with me getting violently sucked out a small window 40,000 feet in the air, is pretty much all I need to scare me. 

Sometimes planes crash into mountains.  Sometimes they're hijacked by terrorists and crashed into buildings while they are screaming "Shut up!" at you.  Sometimes they explode in mid-air.  Sometimes things just go wrong and they take a deep nose dive from miles up and then, boom, they hit the ground.

Sometimes you really do get sucked out the window into the sky. 

So now if I get on a plane I can also get coronavirus because the fucking airlines are forcing people in like sardines even when there's empty seats and room to social distance?  Well, first of all, no surprise there.  They aren't going to let you get something for free, you stupid commoner.  They save the free stuff for rich people, who could pay for it.  They don't give free stuff to people who can't afford to pay for it if they weren't giving it away!   This is America, not some commie country, so try not to be stupid, okay?

Secondly, yeah, and?   I refer you to this story. 

"Woman Partially Sucked Out of Jet When Window Breaks Mid-Flight:  "You hear the pop and she was sucked out from the waist up," one passenger told NBC Nightly News. "There was blood on the windows...her arms were actually out of the airplane and her head was out of the airplane.""

This can conceivably happen to you when you get on a plane.  Is the coronavirus supposed to scare me more?  Am I supposed to be afraid of terrorists getting on the plane?  Come on!  

You know how I handle this shit?

I. Don't. Fly. 

I drive.  Now,  I can do a whole road trip series about the crazy shit that happens to you when you drive around America, and if we weren't in the middle of a pandemic, I would.  I was planning on driving to a lot of places this year, scouting out new locations actually.  But I do take the virus seriously so my ass is at home this year.   

A road trip where I compile video highlights of the assorted lunatics, well meaning imbeciles, and zombies I meet along the way does sound like just the thing for 2021 though. 

And you know what?  Even with the American Zombies I'll run into?  It'll still beat a plane trip.