But I Don't Wanna Live In Zuckerberg's Metaverse
Oh sweet Jesus I have seen the future and it is hell.
WTF is this shit?
Get a load of this:
Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg explains his “Metaverse” virtual world concept, which he says is about “connecting with people.” pic.twitter.com/24YZk5ag5J— The Recount (@therecount) October 28, 2021
Who the fuck sends Mark Zuckerberg out to sell "connecting with people"? Look, I know lizard people aren't real. I think that's a Q conspiracy theory, right? Or some other right wing conspiracy theory. Don't make me look it up! The point is I know lizard people can't be real but watching Zuckerberg attempt to mimic human behavior makes me think they are real. And it scares me... I don't wanna live with the lizard people.
And what is this metaverse? This doesn't seem like it has my favorite Metaverse character, The Flash. Worse, it doesn't have my favorite Metaverse fantasy fuck, and that would be Jason Momoa's Aquaman, or just Jason Momoa. He doesn't have to pretend to be Aquaman for me!
Obviously Zuckerberg's metaverse is not that metaverse, the good metaverse. So therefore it must be the bad metaverse. What happens in this metaverse? Well, judging by this picture we will be "connecting with people" like this:
Oh dear, no thank you! Please God, no. Make it stop.
WTF is this dude, if he is indeed human at all, thinking here?
"Oh I've made billions off of destroying democracy and the prime timeline, so let me create a virtual reality where I can make more billions from people desperate to escape the reality I created?"
And what do you think he is going to do once you upload yourself into Zell? (that's my portmanteau for Zuckerberg and hell; Zell).
Well, he's gonna sell your virtual ass of course.
Now, I know what all you pervs are thinking. "Oh I can fuck hologram supermodel" whoever. How do I know this?
Well, because my first thought was, "hey, can I bang hologram Chris Evans on this thing?"
Well, what can I say, I'm a dirty girl. But then that got followed real quick by my realization that Z himself would be watching and collecting and selling the fact that I want to fuck Chris Evans, just like he has watched, collected, and sold every single fucking thing we ever did, clicked on, posted, or even glanced at, on Facebook.
Eventually they will figure out a way to completely upload us and we will no longer have physical bodies, or if we do, we'll have long forgot how to use them.
Thankfully that should be scheduled sometime after my demise from this shithole planet.
Although, you never know, things to seem to be accelerating, don't they? When the billionaires start flying to space you know shit's about to go real sideways. They're not just doing it for their egos (though there is a lot of that), they making plans people. Big plans.
You don't think they plan to leave their children and grandchildren down here in the hellscape they created coming our way, do you?
In the meantime, keep me the hell out of Zell. That is the creepiest looking fucking video I have ever seen.
I will go to literally any other universe, including Star Trek's Mirror, Mirror parallel evil universe where at least I can try and bang hot Spock.
I mean, I prefer Barry Allen's metaverse, and while I'm at it, I prefer my Barry Allen to be Grant Gustin, but I will take Mirror, Mirror.
I will take anything over the shit I saw in that disturbing video.
I will even take this terrible reality, the one Mark Zuckerberg had such a huge hand in creating.
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